Tag Archive: faith

When we were young we were submitted to various teachings. Most of the time, we read books. We tried to assimilate as much as we could. Then years passed by and somehow we re-connected to what teachers/parents/guardians had told us. Most probably what we’ve been thought was good. Yet in real life it seems that it is a different kind of fish. It’s what we call the gap between the theory and real life!

We were thought to look up to priests for friendship, counselling, ideas etc…Obviously in theory everything is in order. Yet each every human being is formed not only through teaching, but through personal experience, chemicals present in his genes etc…All this will make it highly improbable to foretell his future life as each person has a different outcome, which is based on millions of variables.

The first step is when one is asking for help. It brings the baptised person close to a priest. This is the work of the priest after all! But what happens when most of the priests feel all alone, neglected, alienated, disappointed and put aside? A normal kind of friendship (obviously there is nothing wrong), could be a tempting one for the priest. Instead of listening and comforting the person, the priest fulfils his needs for friendship, attention, love etc…within the counselling sessions. A counsellor has to listen to the client and not vice-versa, at least he can’t talk for a long period of time. The fact that the priest starts talking about his life means automatically that the sessions are taking a different path!

On the part of the person who is seeking the priest’s help, things start moving differently when they view the priest not as a counsellor but as the one who is fulfilling their dream of the ideal man! Obviously when one meets another person for a few hours weekly, it’s very easy to idolise that person! Remember that most people as viewed at work, might seem to be the ideal person. It’s when one lives with the person that one sees the complete picture! Yet, when one is hungry for love, recognition, attention and self affirmation, all other things will occupy a less important place in their lives! They just want to cling to somebody no matter what! It could be that we’re living in anonymous cities (Western part of the world), hence we desperately need friends!

We’ve been saying for quite some time now that priests who explain the word of God every Sunday (plus maybe other public meetings), are practically revealing their inner self to the general public. He is the one who speaks about a lot of values where no one speaks anymore (or at least not that often!). Speaking about such values will put more fire on a woman’s heart who is burning with desire to have a loving partner.

The priest in most cases, has all the time of the world to meet, listen and talk with parishioners. He is the one who makes his own timetable hence, he is easily available! The priest has no one to report to for his day to day running. Hence he can postpone last minute meetings without giving any real reason or hiding behind superficial reasons!

We don’t wish to give the message that it’s impossible, yet in the present circumstances, it’s getting more difficult to be a good friend to a priest. When a person is not complete (in many senses), it could lead to trouble, whether he is a priest, bishop, Pope, woman etc…In mathematics they used to teach us that a minus ( – ) with a minus ( – ), make a plus!

Our wish to have married priests will help the church to have a better system where priests are living in a relationship which will help them understand better the need for attention, love, affirmation etc…We’re not saying that it’s foolproof. There is nothing perfect. Yet on the human side of the argument, it will help them to be better prepared to work in today’s church.

Second Class Priests!

In the absence of love stories between priests and women, we are sharing our reflections regarding the latest news in the Catholic church.

In a March 2017 interview with German newspaper Die Zeit, Pope Francis used the term viri probati – in this context, religious married men of proven character – in saying he was open to the idea of a married priesthood, as is allowed for deacons, in remote areas where the priest shortage is particularly serious.

We are still not 100% sure of the outcome of married priests as we are still receiving conflicting news! Read this article

In any case it seems that all newspapers are agreeing that married priesthood is again in the news. Mulling all kind of news to look for positive news, we see some troubling ones. In the quoted statement made above, we have one single question: So are married priests just fillers? That is: are they being allowed as if they are necessary evil? Are they being allowed simply to fill in the blanks? Are we sort of second class priests who are allowed to work as priests simply because there is lack of?

Many people point to married priests because they think that will stop sexual abuse of children. People focus on sex because for news agencies it sells a lot of money! We do notice many priests who are living a solitary life. They are practically moving bodies but dead in their minds. Others who travel most of the time. Some who embrace luxuries. Others who are simply walking study books which amply shows the negative effects of forced celibacy. The list goes on and on.

Our main point of view has remained the same. Most of the apostles were married. Are we going to follow the bible or are we going against it? They do quote the bible profusely in other moral matters, yet about this one they are so silent! Why? If the apostles did it, why not the priests of today? Or are we like a supermarket: we pick up what we like in the church?!

Having married priests we hope it will bring the focus of the church on new challenges. One might be the complete overhaul of the relationship teaching (and not sex!). Strong and stable relationship calls for consequences which will help the priest to mature as he faces different challenges in life. One glaring example would be children. Taking care of your own children will bring a new insight in the life of the priest. Married priesthood will help the priest to reconnect with normal life with all its challenges. Consequently, the whole church will change. This is the revolution which we are looking forward to experience. In the end there will be winners all the way. All would feel much nearer to God. Everybody will experience the Emmanuel – God is with us! It would be interesting to visit a priest who has kids crying, eating and dirtying all the house whilst he is trying to communicate with God! It would be a good example of how to keep God in the centre of all activity!

It’s up to our readers to continue our reflection.

We’ve been insisting that married priesthood opens up the priest to a new reality: one of them meeting many people who are unchurched. One of the most common solutions would be to invite them to church and have a frankly talk. The immediate problem arises: what about the teachings of the church today? If they truly come to church there remains one big problem: how to reconcile people’s expectations with the teaching of the church. This is one of the reasons why in the Western Culture, people are leaving the church.

The Second Vatican Council (a meeting for all bishops which took place between 1962-1965), emphasized that we no longer support a theory which has to be put into practice but rather see the praxis (practice)  or how the christian community is living and form up the theory. If we really believe this, then we could start the teaching for adults and surely the adults will come. They would feel truly adults in faith as they would have a main part in forming up the teaching of the church. On the other hand, if some unmarried priests or bishops still have the main role in forming up the teaching element of the church, then surely they would be alienated from today’s problems and consequently they would not provide the true teaching of God. It’s no surprise that in the USA today contraceptives still play an important part. It’s the so called celibate, (better to use the unmarried term) priests obsessed with power. No married person who is in his senses, would propose such a thing!

On the other hand we know from experience that others don’t have the luxury of leaving the Catholic Church. There were many married priests who found it really difficult to find a job just because they left the church. Other faithful members cannot show dissent as otherwise they would suffer big consequences. But all in all, there are many people nowadays who are not in agreement with their bishops.

We are very sorry that another bishop had to resign for the same reason: falling in love with a woman. When are we going to read the gospel and notice that most of the apostles were married? Are we still in the middle ages where we used to believe that intelligent woman were either possessed by the devil or else psycho cases? Why are we so afraid of women when Mary was declared mother of God? Another secondary note is that this bishop had to resign simply because he fell in love with a woman: how about other bishops who have hidden the sexual abuse of priests? Do they need to resign? How do they sleep at night? What about their conscience? What about those who have committed suicide because of a sexual abuse by a priest?

Just one positive note: We firmly believe that the Holy Spirit has his own unique ways of changing the church. Consequently we are not pessimistic about the Catholic Church. Another married father and son are ordained as Catholic priests. Obviously there were Anglicans before joining the Catholic Church. So the people of God are getting used to see married priests. That means a lot. Well the change has come! Who knows what might happen in the future?

Homily {in Maltese}