Tag Archive: priest fondles breasts


Rev Father has a baby!

Hello! This is Aj from the Philippines which has a large number of Roman Catholics. I’ve been looking for this site because I want to share my feelings and story too. I need some advice so I can move on and know what to do. I’m a Director in my company and a nurse by profession so currently I’m a health advocate and sharing true health to all people. One day a friend of mine referred me to a Major Seminarian School, so maybe I could offer them my products. At first I was very shy because it was my first time to go there, meeting seminarians and Priests. But it was all good.

Then one Day they invited me to visit again the seminary school for there was a birthday party, probably a luncheon together with the seminarians and all priests who resided in that school. On that day we were about to start the birthday party when a Guy about 5’7 in height came out from the office downstairs and with a smile, of course I smiled back. In my mind ” Hmm He’s cute and Handsome” All I knew he was just one of the ordinary people destined to meet that day but to my surprise, He was the Birthday Boy and what hurt me was he was a Priest. Well, nothing is special, I just let the idea go by the wind. So, I greeted him with a Happy B’day Father!

I ate lunch with the seminarians and all the residence priest together. And I just left the place for almost a year… then it was one month of Sept.2016 when I went back to that place to sell our products because it was already my deadline to pay bills and credit cards so I went there. This B’day Boy, ” The Priest” that I once met was there again. I asked him to buy my products…. he he that was so embarrassing coz I’m selling it by force! And He offered me to lend me his money. I promised to return it back in due time. I ate my pride and took it! He was leaving for 2 weeks for his retreat in Baguio so we’ll see each other after that. We texted and having video call after his activity and before he was going back to bed till he came back after the retreat and planned to see each other. Finally he returned back after 2 weeks. To give thanks and for welcoming him again and secretly send him a bunch of flowers and balloons in the seminary school as a form of thank you and post b’day gift. He was really surprised that day because that was his first time to receive such a gift like that. And he knew it came from me. Ha ha it was my first time to do that too. Ah well I’m in a long distance relationship for 3 years now to my Fililippino bf who’s in America, had never had the chance to see each other personally just in skype, fb and social media.

To cut it short, I’m single for almost 8 years after my first boyfriend and next was this LDR for 3 years. So, for me that “killing factor in tagalog” or goosebumps and attraction every time I saw this Priest is really breathtaking for I used to be alone every time. Back to that roses I gave him, He thanked me a lot and he even cried for he never received one ever since” Well, you’re a Priest that’s why! He he.. We agreed that “to fall in love with each other is a BIG NO NO! For us because we are just friends and it’s a wrongful act If it ever does happen then we need to move away from each other. The communication continues… then one day he invited me to attend his mass in cabugao, so i decided to go. He invites me to eat at the parish in order for me to introduce my products to the other priests but i refused. I told him that I’ll just meet him outside. After his dinner he gave me a lift at 711 and decided to stay together to have some catch ups! I was really nervous and excited that time because the feeling was really good and it was so overwhelming. We don’t know what happened next till we just discovered that we are already in a certain place, private place, private room, to be exact like normal couple and Yes! We kissed, We hugged and We made Love. We stayed together till morning! Things happened so fast. I couldn’t explain my feelings. We bid goodbye after that 1st time that we made love. The communication continues… and it gets deeper and deeper especially from the moment when he said “I LOVE YOU”, and of course just to be honest to myself I said “I LOVE YOU Too”.

After the first time we continued seeing each other every Sunday or anytime as long as we wanted to meet. The feelings gets deeper and deeper like normal couples who used to made love and share happy moments together. For almost one year of having together we had a Baby Julian and he thanked me a lot for giving him the opportunity to give him a child. We love each other so much that one time he told me to leave his ministry for us, his family. I told him to decide well because it will be a BIG decision. He cried every time he’ll see our picture with our baby. He wanted to be with us normally but just can’t.

A few months from now he’ll be leaving to Australia, he promised me that he’ll be with us very soon. My mom knew already that he’s the Father of my Baby and accepted it. Now we don’t know what to do. He’s 6 years in service to God. He pursued his Priesthood because he bargained to God that if his mom survived the brain tumour then He would serve him forever…but now, I was already on the scene and our Baby. Do you have any advice about us? Please help, we love each other so much.

I remind everybody that comments which judge or try to bully this woman will simply not be tolerated. But besides that. This case has a new revelation. The priest now is a biological father of a baby. This changes everything. He has the legal and moral duty to take care of his own baby. Now excuse can be used in order not to take care of the baby. He can’t simply hide and go away. Let’s continue following this case. Let’s all be one in our online community by helping Aj to have a proper care for her baby.

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A Spanish love story

My name is Cris and I’m from Spain. I will refer to “my” priest as Father A. I have been thinking about sharing my story for a while but, at times it was too painful to keep thinking about it and feeling alienated because falling in love with a priest is not something common, at times, I’ve felt alone and even ridiculous. However, I’m glad there is a safe space where I can share my story with people who’s been there. I’m not going to get into details because there are too many but I will try my best to be as accurate as possible. Thank you in advance for listening.

I met the priest on February last year. I was a college student and I had to take extra credits and through a friend I took a class on Theology, which I love. There I met him. I was 27 and he was 36. I really liked him on the spot because he was very charismatic, goofy, awkward, smart and he seemed a genuinely kind person. I don’t think he paid much attention to me those days. However, in April we met by chance at a college event and we started talking. Everything was fine and normal. Then summer came and we both parted ways. Next semester I went back to college and I texted him because I really wanted to be friends with him and we met. Nice but very formally.

He later told me that we could go someday to have coffee or something and I immediately agreed. For me it was normal having a coffee with a friend. He happened to be a priest and had a right to have friends like any other human being. At the coffee shop we talked about life and stuff and when we were to part ways when he gave me a present: a book he had previously lent me. I admit that I was shocked and glad. I did not know what to think about it. I thought “well he is a priest, he is just being generous because he sees I’m a little alone.” Inside I was falling hard for him. Later that month I had to admit of having loving feelings and I thought to myself: this is shitty, but if there is a possibility of him liking me, I have to try. So months later (yes, I was a very insecure person back then), I asked him for coffee and he said yes. So we finally met and we talked normally and I thought, for how the conversation was going, that he was trying to push me back. I was sad but ok, but before we parted ways we went for a small walk around campus (it was dark) and when we were alone he took my hand and interlocked his fingers with mine. I was, again, shocked and I did not know what to do but i felt so happy that I just went with the flow. We kept talking but we did not talk about what that meant or about feelings. We parted normally, but i was still in hock and, because of all my insecurities, I did not know what to think because he also did not text me or anything.

Since that moment what we call here hot and cold treatment started between us. At points I thought I was over analysing things but one day I was brave enough and, after a day full of flirting, asked what we were doing. At first he denied it and said that it was me that flirted too much but then he had to admit it was also him. He said that yes, that he was attracted to me but he was not going to leave anything, that was his life. I understood but what hurt me the most was that for a long time he tried to justify all his actions, saying things like he was just a man, that he was having a tough time in his life, etc. We finally kissed, he told me to please leave him, that he did not want to fail his vows. He even told me that when we are in Heaven he would look for me to be together. I do not know if he was serious or if he just told me that just to leave him.

I felt that by justifying himself I had only been a scapegoat, that I meant nothing special to him and that I was ridiculed for having falling in love with him. To this day (and after many more things that happened that I’m not going to tell because it will take too long) I still have a hard time believing that he may have been in love with me, but not enough to try to go into real discernment. I do know if he actually had a crisis in his ministry because of us, but it was not important enough to do a real and serious discernment and just give us a try. Deep down I do understand that it’s his life and vocation, but after so many failed relationships I really wanted to feel loved and cared by a man who is kind and gentle and who likes me back…we have not seen each other in three months and we rarely talk.

Last time we talked he told me he had very good memories of us and that I was not the only one who pursued the relationship. I felt a little bit better but still it is not enough for us being together.
I’m sorry for my English. I do not know what else to say.

I say that Cris described her relationship really well. Now the practical part: how can we help her? First and foremost let’s keep her in our prayers. Secondly, can we share our experience in order to help understand better how a woman-priest relationship goes?

I’m Annie and my priest’s name is Jack. I’ve been reading your blog for sometime now and I wanted to finally share some of my story (it’s okay to post this). It’s not very detailed but it’s enough. I met a priest in 2013 just before my husband left on a business trip. This trip was to last 5 months abroad. My husband is very kind, and I would say we have a good marriage. This priest was from an other parish filling in for our priest.

After my husband departed for his business trip, I filled my days with daily mass and volunteer work. In those days I would see this priest. There was an instant chemistry that I was very aware of. He was too. There was much eye contact, both catching and looking away and catching again. I felt that his homilies always spoke to me personally. I felt the hot and cold too at first. It would go from one week he’d “see” me and then the following week completely ignoring me. In those moments of being ignored I felt crushed. We didn’t speak much. I would email him occasionally asking for a Mass intention or pray for someone or something but nothing beyond that. 

Eventually, my husband returned home. The hot and cold and eye catching didn’t cease with the priest but seemed to increase. The day came when this priest was to return to his home parish. It was in our goodbye that set everything in motion. He expressed not wanting to leave and saying he wished we’d had more time together. We emailed in earnest after that day. Our correspondences was filled with double meanings…it was frustrating. I met with a few weeks later. It was at this time he expressed his love for me. I was so shocked and pleased all rolled into one.

Over the next several months we would meet and our closeness grew both emotionally and physically. Until he broke his promise of celibacy and I broke my marital vows. We continued this way for a year. We’d meet at different places, it would always end in us being intimate. At first i thought what we experienced in friendship and love was special, unique and true. But as time progressed the illusion of us being “meant to be” as he put it came crashing down.

I felt many times he wanted to know all about me but would share only bits and pieces about himself. He wanted to know and meet my friends and family but I was never to meet his. I would want to plan ahead, he would give me excuses for why he couldn’t. Then he would make palms with other friends and family. Yes, we’d text and call but my communication with him didn’t take priority. There would be days I wouldn’t hear from him. I would take time to ensure he knew I was thinking of him constantly, at the expense of spending that time and effort on my family. He would just say he was too busy or too tired….or just couldn’t. He would be jealous and it would cause arguments between us. He always wanted to advise me on my life and would get upset when I chose not to follow his guidance. It was like he wanted an observer rather than a participant in his life. He never seemed to understand actions speak louder than words. 

When I realized that the relationship would always be one of secrecy, one built on falsities, one that would never progress beyond a rendezvous, I couldn’t continue. I told him I just wanted to be friends. He wanted us to continue as we were…confiding in each other, communication, still seeing each other…everything but the physical contact. I couldn’t agree to that. It would be tempting to just fall back into what we were. So I cut everything off cold turkey. He hasn’t contacted me at all since I said no more to all of it. I sometimes get the urge to text him because it’s hard to stop all contact with someone after a year of constant communication but then I remember that he wasn’t mature enough to tell me goodbye. At first I was upset he didn’t contact me back, but now I am grateful. It has allowed me to make a clean break from him. 

Why do I want to share all this? Because after reading all the posts from women hoping against hope their priest will be different, I had to speak up. Aren’t we more than the little bit of time and attention they give us? Don’t we want more for ourselves? Someone who will fully commit to us? Their time, attention and love? Where when you meet or talk there isn’t an elephant in the room looming over head because of who and what he is? 

I’m mad at myself for listening to the flowery things he said. For not paying attention to his actions towards me. I feel I wasted the last couple of years on him to feel immense guilt and sadness. I remain married to my husband. I am constantly working to better myself and my marriage. 

It’s up to the readers to comment in order to make our blog very lively. Last week we had a record of 273 comments! Thanks to all who participated and made our blog truly unique. Every opinion counts! On the other hand we had some interesting news…The Pope is giving back authority to the local bishops to fix the liturgical translations. He is giving back authority to the local bishops. Remember that we need to pester our local bishops about married priests! Please do your part. Don’t lose faith. Let’s keep going. Don’t be afraid if they don’t answer or they seem to be very cold or indifferent. If we wish to testify about our Lord Jesus Christ, we need adults who are strong enough to withstand any coldness or bitterness! Some positive news (thanks to Maria from Italy)..the Hungarian bishops are asking for married priests!!! In the USA there is a local community who is asking for married priests!!!! Let’s unite and move forward…the future is not very far away!

The priest and today’s world

The media and the common people are very creative when they invent stories especially involving a priest who has just left. Most probably they give a reason to something that they find extremely hard to digest! The usual answer is that one left to get married!

Although in some cases it might ring true, yet in most cases, we encounter a different picture. The priest is not so happy with his surroundings, happenings or way of life. In the quoted article, one finds an ex seminarian (one who is studying for priesthood), who is not happy with the way of life the friars are living in the monastery. He feels very uncomfortable that whilst his mother has to make both ends meet, in his monastery there is a superfluous luxury notwithstanding the fact that they took the vow of poverty! The most important thing of all is that it has effected his spirituality. Although for others it may seem to be trivial, it cost him his place in the monastery. He couldn’t accommodate this divorce between what he believes and what he sees daily in the monastery.

One of the most terrible lies is that priests don’t get married because they need to be 24/7 for the people of God. Many years ago people used to call them to come and accompany people at their hour of death. Now that job is practically gone except maybe in hospitals. The problem with most priests is that they view their work according to the number of masses or sacraments they need to administer. In most parts of the Western world church attendance has gone down so practically they have much less work to do especially during weekdays. On the other hand circumstances have changed and most people are not be found during the traditional eight to five working shift.

Mass and sacraments have lost their magic touch for the common people. People need to be evangelised. People need a human contact with the church. They need to be taught many things about religion as they are ‘ignorant’ in most religious issues. Most probably they would get the wrong impression of the church because in many cases it’s mostly silent in the digital world! When people are passing through a difficult/loving phase in their lives, the church is mostly absent. Even attending mass, in most cases it is something very anonymous! This is a fact which seems not to preoccupy bishops when amalgamating parishes!

Most probably the biggest issue (which goes unnoticed by many), is that most priests, outside the sacramental world, they don’t know how to deal with it! The still don’t know the importance of building a real community in their parish. They were never trained how to do pastoral work properly (it is not simply the distribution of the sacraments). Pastoral work should culminate in the person finding Christ and building a personal relationship. Now before embarking on such an adventure, one needs to know the flock. There are various ways and means how to get to know the flock but the best one seems that of family visiting. It is physically demanding and time consuming, yet it yields the best results. It builds a good bond between the priest and the parishioners.

As priests are transferred from one parish to another, the parish council seems to be the most appropriate one in order to work hand in hand with the pastor. How are relations with the pastor? We can find various examples yet very few parishes provide professional teaching and caring for it. The parish council is another largely unknown ‘thing’ in the parish. Most people are never introduced to it. They never vote for it so how could it be an effective instrument in the hand of the parish?

Then there is the church in general. The priest comes into contact with many relationships, hidden or otherwise. Yet he is representing the church. In many cases there is an internal conflict between what the church believes and what the faithful are living. Some people prefer to ignore such conflicts. Others simply leave the church, others try to find a leeway. Many pastors know that such conflict is bound to get bigger all the time if the hierarchy (people at the very top of the church), do not live in the same conditions. Recently I had a discussion with some religion teachers. They were surprised that the church hasn’t changed her mind when it comes to contraceptives. The fact is that these religion teachers have taken a different answer to such challenge in their married life which is beyond that of the church. Now what about priests and their internal conflicts? How would they solve them?

We hope of providing some food for thought to our readers. As usual, we didn’t cover all that needs to be written down. But that’s a big plus for our readers to start writing immediately in order to provide more shades about the mentioned topic!

Recently the Pope himself said that maybe he won’t visit some countries as by that time there would be a new Pope! This is no new news. Many priests are very old. Will they live beyond 100 years? Most of them will surely die before reaching 90 years, maybe 80. It’s a time bomb that we knew about it a long time ago. Most of the priests serving today are over 60. So some mathematics will help us to get to know the future. Who will serve the parishes then?

We never had any doubts that married priests will form part of the future church. This is simply because of one reason: there won’t be enough priests. Even the most dogmatic and anti-married priesthood supporter will accept the fact that most parishes will become priest-less!!!

On the other hand, it seems that most non-married priests are still resisting the idea. Is it worthwhile to launch a ‘battle’ against such priests? They are still in power and they know how to play the game of authority. It would be a suicide. Most of today’s priests are never going to leave the comfort zone. We explained the various reasons in past issues. One can go back and see why it’s so difficult for a priest to start a new life as a married person.

Any other solution? Yes. This is the biggest change we need to do. Enough with waiting a higher authority to say yes. Let’s start today. How? By looking for the right people to manage a parish. There should be a never ending of list of people who have a kind heart and are ready to serve their community. How about encouraging them to take a leadership role? The challenge today is that if a religious community dies, it will be very difficult to substitute that kind of community with something else. Our communities will become anonymous when there is no unifying factor such as religion.

In practical terms, what does it mean? Well, managing a parish, besides involving managerial skills (which they might possess already), it calls for one to be well versed in theology. How about starting a course today? There are universities which offer evening courses in theology. Obviously this might a take a long time and it needs highly motivated people! That’s why we are suggesting the idea today, so that by the time the call for married priests comes out, they would be already qualified for the job!

What about the priests who left the parish are living their love dream? Well, seeing the needs of so many people, gives them authority to continue living their priesthood. They can start their own communities which will surely include many people who had left the community many years ago. Like Jesus in the gospel they will start discovering new people who live in the periphery of the church.

In one line, we can’t be critical about the Catholic Church without ourselves dirtying our hands in the process of helping out to create a new face for the church! Let’s work!

We were happy that most readers sent us quotations from newspapers about the Pope’s recent pronunciations about married priesthood. It seems that finally our readers are taking a more active role. This is the church we want to see worldwide. Baptised people are not simply receivers where they are happy to receive instructions from priests. They have a mind, a soul, a heart and a lot of experience how they experience God. Consequently, God can use anybody to bring changes in His church. This is not just theoretical but practical because the Pope is becoming aware that in most parts of the world, the church is disappearing simply because there is no one to tell people about the Good News. He has to resort to married people as otherwise the consequences could be disastrous.

This is a big improvement because now it’s coming from the mouth of the Pope. Obviously as usual some people are looking for more rapid changes in a shorter time. Some are completely against celibacy. Well we were never against celibacy. We are against celibacy when it is imposed and it is chosen at a very young age (over 18 years of age criteria is simply not enough!). Celibacy has its value in the church. We do believe that there are people who live celibacy in a wonderful way notwithstanding the sexual abuse crisis. Let’s not put all priests in one basket, although we do admit that these are very few.

Some people thought that the Pope would let his priests the liberty of choosing either to remain celibate priests or else get married. In this regard, it seems that he chose a conservative attitude by keeping things as they are. He is for married people who ask for priesthood and not priests who ask for marriage. There could be reasons for this: is he afraid that most priests would go for marriage? Indirectly is he saying that marriage might disrupt the spirituality of priests who are used to live alone? Is he afraid that maybe they need to pay more the priest because he has a family? Or maybe he is going after mature (of a certain age) married people, whose children are married and settled? Implying again that a true family (with young children) would hinder the priest from working in a parish? Again, one might imply that he is looking for mature people (of a certain age) in order to avoid more sex scandals?

On the other hand, calling people to join priesthood, means they need training. That means another challenge for seminaries (places where priests are trained). Are they going to join the celibate ones? Are they going to be trained in a separate place? What about the training years? How much do they need? So in practical terms we still have to wait for seven to eight years more to see married priests. In the meantime we have several priests who are not practising any more that could be called instantly where they can start to serve immediately. What’s wrong with going for this option?

We don’t know what’s inside the mind of the Pope but we were surprised that he let out his opinion with a newspaper. Is it the right channel to give out his views? Or maybe there are problems with the Vatican PRO system? What about the rest of the world? Aren’t there mature people who might give their opinion too? Or are we still in a pyramid where decisions are simply taken by those at the top? This is just one subject where the rest of the world thinks differently than those living inside the Vatican walls…..At least this Pope is more near us mortals, than the rest of the bishops, priests etc….

Again let’s not fall into depression. Let’s not give up! Let’s go for the hard work. We need to go out and share our opinion with the rest of the church. Let’s show them that we’re prepared. We need married priests even where there are a good number of priests. A married priest has a different charisma. He has something which others might not have. On the other hand, the needs of the baptised people are growing. People look out for God especially in dark moments. Where is the priest in such moments if they are so tied to the parish with all its activities? Like children in a family, today’s children need more attention and care then when we used to have sixes and sevens!! Same wise for the church. The church cannot do without a good number of priests, married and non-married ones in these days as the needs of the baptised people grow each day.

Our woman today is Dorothy. She was a former nun who became a policewoman (cop). She fell in love with a handsome and intelligent man (got his PhD), who happened to be a priest too. It seems that he presented himself as a priest who had left…but actually reading official documents, he didn’t leave at all. Like some other priests he wanted to have the best of both worlds: the married life and the celibate life!

This does not mean that all priests are like him. Some of the priests turn out to be wonderful fathers. Yet there is always a slight possibility that a priest is luring a woman for sex and just to have fun. It’s up to the mind of the woman to make sure that the priest is not playing at all. We are all in favour of married priests. Married means to stick to one woman and to take responsibility for one’s actions. We are NOT in favour of priests who just go around and use women for their own egoistic needs.

Where did you meet?

We met in Eldoret in 2005 at a convent where I was was being inculcated into sisterhood. Then based in Spain, Fr Oure had visited the convent on official assignment. The priest, however, showed interest on the first encounter.

What did he tell you when you met?

He lied to me about his exact role in church. Fr Oure would then make frequent visits to the nunnery, where he made sexual advances towards me.

When did you get married?

We married when I was 32 years old and he was 49, in December 2013, but we started experiencing problems barely three months into their marriage. He is a serial womaniser and his constant infidelity is the reason for our constant fights before we parted ways recently. I caught my husband in bed with another woman in our house in Nakuru’s Kasarani estate!

Do you have children?

Yes we have one son but I had miscarriage of our second child as this was caused by physical abuse by Fr Oure. He became so angry when I caught him on our matrimonial bed
with a prostitute!

What do you have in mind now?

I want to sue the church for damages as his order says that he is still ‘in’ the church.

Now for fairness sake, the priest is presenting a different version of facts but he didn’t deny sleeping with other women! So indirectly he had admitted to not being faithful. Like some other priests, he is not interested in marriage but in a concubine, where secretly he can have sex as much as he wants to! One can see the original article at: Article

Reading and reflecting through our readers comments, views, spirituality etc…sometimes one gets the idea that because we are baptised, we should have an easy life!

Our Catholic sign is the Cross. We were never promised a rose garden! Psychologically and spiritually we should prepare ourselves for challenges 24/7. We have to convince a lot of people because the Catholic Church is composed of more than 1 billion people. Not everybody sees the urgency in calling for married priesthood! Not everybody agrees with our ideas. Shall we drop our ‘fighting’ spirit? Shall we enclose ourselves in our small world? No way!

We are sure that we are on the right track because finally the Pope is pushing forward the same ideas! That means a lot in at least giving us credit that we are not damaging the church! In every parish there is the urgent need of more priests. Why? Because priests are what cement is to building blogs, they serve to build the sense of a spiritual community. Although we are calling all laity to become truly adult in faith (actively participating in the parish), priest are always needed as they the ones who can confess and celebrate the unique sacrament of the Eucharist.

Besides, the priest can visit many families to bring God’s news. The priest has to preach and teach the people of God not only about God himself but rather bring the latest teaching of the church to the common people. It’s not a joke because there is a lot of ignorance outside the parish about God, the church and its rules etc….

The latest news from Ireland seems that the bishops are NOT going to take the Pope’s invitation and ask about priests to be allowed to get married! Well, it’s not the end of the story. We urge all our readers from Ireland (and non-Irish readers) to write to the bishops to urge them change their mind. We need active readers who are not afraid of challenges. You can write directly to the Irish bishops here!

On the other hand, on a different subject but regarding another hot potato for bishops, Maltese bishops surprised everyone about their attitude when dealing with remarried people. The Maltese bishops were bold enough to take the first step instead of waiting to see what others might do. They interpreted the Pope’s letter to the world called, Amoris Laetitia (The Joy of Love). If one needs to read the Pope’s original document, one can go here.

So please don’t lose faith! Let’s keep going. Let’s keep talking and discussing with other people. A married priest is nearer to the common people. All that he does, shows his commitment to his family. He is not a loner, he is accompanied by a family. He cannot forget about what other people are passing through because he has his own kids who are facing all the challenges of the common people.

An invisible Priest

We’ve had a record number of responses from our readers to our latest article. We’ve been waiting for a long time to read the message of a priest who is deciding whether to leave the parish and join his woman, or abandon her, and continue with the work in the parish. We wish to say a big thank you to all our readers.

Well some of the readers did not agree with the latest posting. I did leave their message online in order to have a blog which is nearer the truth rather than have one which is all positive and everything is fine. Well the priest who leaves the parish in order to marry, makes a bold statement whether he is conscious of it or not. Now some parishioners are not prepared to handle the truth.

We remember ourselves passing through some of the streets of our town (we live on a very small island!!). Some people just looked the other way. I was shocked at first but with some counselling I realised that they couldn’t handle our new situation. Some of them were embarrassed because they had come to confession and they had ‘emptied their sack’ (as an old saying goes), full of shocking secrets. It happened to our Lord Jesus Christ when he was resurrected. He was the same person, yet nobody was prepared to handle his new situation. In fact, at first, they didn’t recognize Him!

Some of our regular readers were shocked at first by the response of a few of them. Well not all people are going to be happy that Patrick and Michelle are going to get married. Indirectly they are saying: if a priest leaves, I feel at a loss because I’m used to certainties, dogma, truths. Now everything is upside down and I can’t control the situation anymore! So I panick and protest and put all my anger on to such a lovely couple!!

On the other hand, many more people will be happy for both of them. There will be many people who will come forward and understand their challenges and help them. It’s a test time to see who the real friends are…..!!!! Patrick and Michelle, you’re going to be surprised for sure!

One of the most incredible surprises was my late mum who was a priest lover (in the right sense). When I told her some of the true stories about what happens on the inside of the human church she surprised me with a unique response: If I knew about what you were experiencing, I would have come for you, prepared your bags, and took you home! A devout or traditional mum obeys the church…..yet she has a heart which understands what other human beings do not understand!

Other couples were happy because they knew that as a married couple, we were in a better position to understand and minister to them. And this was another surprise for us. We never thought of working again in the church (I would scare people away, one parish priest told me!!), yet the new community was forming in a lovely and surprising manner. One is this huge following on the internet. The other are the true friends who ask me for the sacraments plus spiritual help because they truly believe that once a priest always a priest. At the beginning I was at the point of refusing. But one of them, who knows well the laws of the church, quoted one law which says that a priest cannot refuse a person who is asking for spiritual help (sacramental or not)!

To cut a long story short, I thought that once I leave the parish, I would pack my priestly things and I would have never used them again….yet God has some surprises along the way. Obviously we are not forcing anyone to follow this path. Most married priests refuse to do any work connected with the church. We do respect their decision. We are not here to judge anybody. We do pray for them and for their well being so they’ll live happily ever after.

Incredibly now we are meeting with the real people (most of the church goers, because of various reasons, do not represent the rest of the population). They speak to us honestly. We do not speak from high above (the pulpit [raised stand for preachers in a church]). We speak from our honest experience too. Now we realise that the church is alienated from the real world. We see that we need to help more people. In this phase we can help more because they see us as a normal couple who is facing normal challenges. Surprisingly, they find that the married priest is more available then the so called unmarried priest!!!

May God bless you all!

Hello my name is Jackie. I met my priest (Maximilian) last 2009. I was a freshmen student back then. We had a project in our Religious Education subject, a church involvement where we had to render some hours in serving/ helping in a church. He was the parish priest of the church that time. I was with a group of five, all girls. That’s the first time we met. After that day, I never got the chance to see him even if he was a professor in that same university I am studying with. 

It was in 2010 when my classmates, who were my group mates on the project , had planned to visit him and thank him in allowing us to do our project in his parish. That was when our communication started. Days before our scheduled visit to him, I had my facebook status of the lyrics of a song just changing the word “girl” to “boy”. This is my exact status: Don’t love me for fun boy, Let me be the one boy, Love me for a reason, Let the reason be love… I had no other intentions but to tell boys to love all the girls they’re in relationship with. However he liked my status and left a comment that he likes the way I changed “girl” to “boy”. He also said that it was one of his favorite songs before. So I teased him that he might remember someone which made him relate with the song and I asked him to tell the story. He said that it was so many years ago already. He also said that before, whenever he hears the song he would remember that someone. But now, whenever he hears the song, it’s me he’s going to remember. So I asked him to sing the song during our visit to him and he accepted and started practicing there and then. I felt happy but honestly I never felt anything special because I never thought of anything more because for me it was just a friendly conversation. 

On the day of our visit, we shared many stories. My group mates and his companions in the convent sang many songs. I am not a good singer and I am a very shy person so I never had plans of singing and I never sang at all. But he kept his promise. He sang the song for me, not only once but many times. I felt somehow special but still no malice at all. 
After that day, we communicated more often. Another party was held and some of the professors in our school including one of our professor before were present. We had fun the whole night. He even accompanied me and my classmates home (whenever he invites us, it’s not only me but our group who happened to be my classmates and friends). When I arrived home, I texted him thanking him for inviting us and for accompanying me and my friends home. He did not reply so I got worried because he was drunk when he drove us home. He answered my call and said that he was driving when I texted so he wasn’t able to answer. I asked him why it took him so long to reach his house and he said that he already arrived at their house few minutes ago however he and his companion had some misunderstanding so he decided to leave and go to his brother’s house who happened to live very far from his place. But because I called, he said that he learned that he left his driver’s license so he’s not going to push through with his plans of going to his brother and just talk to me over the phone instead. He thanked me and said that I was his angel because if I didn’t call him he might be driving without noticing that his license was not there. We talked for a while until he decided to go home. When he arrived home, he called again and we talked until the wee hours. He calls me by my name and I really don’t like people who call my name. I always ask them to call me by my nickname and I told him that. But with my surprise he called me by my nickname with “my”. Like for example my nickname is Pretty. He called me “nkyPretty”. He even asked me if I got a crush on him and I answered him no. Because honestly that was the truth at that time. 

That was a turning point because we started to chat, to text and to talk over the phone very much often than before. One time, my professor who happened to be his friend asked him to go out and have some drinks. To his surprise, that professor asked him to go out because he wanted to ask my priest to help him with me. They talked many things and after their session, he called me and told me about it. However he did not tell me everything over the call. Instead he sent me a message in facebook. He said that when the time the professor confessed to him about his feelings for me, he also thought of how he feels for me. That’s the time I got aware that there was something more between us. He said that I am special to him and that he is happy because of me. So that was when I started to think about everything that happened and that was happening. That’s the time that we both said that we treat each other special. That started that whenever he invited us on a party he I would always be the last that he would drive home because we would go to other place first have some coffees and talk some more (usually parties were held because of Birthdays of his companions in the convent). We can only do that whenever there is a party. However there came a time that even if there is no party, we agreed to go out. That’s the first the he held my hands. I felt kilig. That started our hang outs together. But we never kissed. We never hugged. Just holding hands. 

Since then, we texted more often because that was our way of conversation. Less calls but more texts. However, by the end of 2013 to early 2014 I felt that our communication became infrequent. We didn’t see each other that often, I had lesser calls from him. He would only call whenever I would ask him to. I would always understand him because those were the times that he was sent to other parish without good reasons and that he felt it was unfair for him many factors made him different. He was not the joyful person I met. He got angry easily, he got irritated just for simple reasons and he became less sweet than before. I felt that something has really changed but I never told him about how I felt.

One day, my friends and I met in one of my friends house. We drank and had conversations until one of them asked me if I had something to tell/ share to them. I had no idea of what they were talking about until one them told me that they know that there is something going on between me and my priest. I had no excuse so I told them everything. They asked me what was my plan. So I told them that I really don’t know, maybe stop the relationship that we have. My struggle that time was that I didn’t know what kind of relationship we really had. So after that, when I arrived home I texted him about what happened. He decided to meet me and talk about the real thing between us. But that night, he said that we would have a a platonic relationship. Not just an ordinary one, but something deeper and more special.

We met in a restaurant. We talked with both of us having our own printed research about platonic relationship. He discussed more and I just listened a lot. He told me that the platonic relationship that we have is not like the ordinary meaning of that of Plato. Something that is deeper and more spiritual. He said that we were not committed. That if ever we go beyond that romantic relationship we might be like his priest friends who made wrong decisions because instead of making their relationship better, it became worse. Because of people’s acceptance and many more factors. He also said that whenever I choose to get into a relationship I can do it anytime. That he doesn’t have the right to get angry, jealous etc.. I felt sad and I was hurt because I felt like it was very easy for him to say all that. We finished our conversation right away because he had prior important commitments which gave us limited time to talk. However we agreed that we have talked what our agenda was and that everything was clear. Honestly, I had so many questions that I wasn’t able to ask. And until now, I didn’t give a try to ask. 

I believe that what I am feeling for him is true love. I already told him about someone I had  relationship with when I was in high school but don’t consider it as first love. Puppy love maybe because I was very young that time. I was only able to learn/feel what true love is, that was how I feel for him. I love him dearly. He is the only person who opened my heart into extreme emotions. An emotion of extreme happiness and sadness. 

The problem now is that since the day I felt our relationship dropped. Less communication, less stories, less conversation. Just good morning and good night. I want to tell him how I feel. Almost five years of relationship and until now, I still can’t tell him I love him. I want to tell him that. This might give me a big relief but I am not certain of what will happen next. I am already exploding inside. He may not have any idea of what I am feeling and this might be a surprise for him. I really tried my best to keep this but I failed. I can not fake what my heart feels. What should I do?

By the way, he’s already assigned in his hometown just last year. And to be able to go to his hometown, I have to ride a plane. But because of my job I can go to his place anytime because of my benefit of free tickets. I already asked him twice if I could visit him but he had many reasons to refuse. I never asked him again because I only get hurt. I am afraid that if I ask him again, I might get the same response. However, just last week, I was really surprise to see his pictures in facebook with his friends, they were some of the choirs from his assigned parish before he transferred to his hometown. I already met some of them during those parties where he invited us before. I was really upset that he can entertain them and give them time while he would always reject my visit. I am anxious about us and every negative feeling it gives me.. 

Hello readers! How are we going to answer for yet another love story involving an adult woman and a priest? Please let’s put ourselves in her shoes. There is no place for judgement nor orders about what to do. How about sharing our experience ? May God bless you all.