Tag Archive: priest masturbates in front of me


Pentecost and Married Priests

We have just celebrated Pentecost. In lay terms it’s the birth of the church. The apostles were all behind closed doors and windows afraid of what might happen to them. On Pentecost day, the Holy Spirit descended upon all apostles and they left all their fears, doubts, jealousy and lack of faith behind, went out and started to talk in the name of Jesus. It was a big transformation.

In Europe in these last days, it seems that we are electing several governments. Our mentality is that we elect people to represent us whilst we continue with our lives. Is that a similar attitude in the church? How many people leave the church for one thousand and one reasons? Yet who is going to remain ‘in’ to bring about the change? It is an appropriate reflection on Pentecost’s day. Are we just young children who are happy to play with the toys whilst the other adults take care of us in the church? Pentecost was so transforming because the apostles realised that it was their turn to start speaking in the name of Jesus Christ. Do we have so many lay people available in the church?

Married priesthood is important because married people should be considered as a great asset for the church. It could be the building block for the whole church. It’s up to the people to ask their local bishops for married priesthood. How many of our readers are ready to pester their bishops to call for married priesthood?
This does not mean that it’s going to be that easy. Some bishops (example in the UK), are already too silent about it. But that does mean that we stop doing our part of speaking to them?

In most of our cases, we continued practising priesthood because people did ask us for our services. We saw many local areas where priests do not go. Lay people are left all alone. Who is going to attend to their needs? This is like an emergency. All people who can help are obliged to do so.

Emergency or not, Married priests feel that they have a special charisma for today’s people to bring God’s message. It’s the sign of the times. People who read between the lines should come to the same conclusion: we need married people to bridge the distance between priests and married people. Married people will look upon their priests in order to look for concrete examples on how to live the gospel in today’s world.

Who gives birth? Who is side by side with a new born baby? Who breasts feed the baby? Who answers the child’s questions? Who teaches him about God? The answer is usually (although there are some exceptions) a woman. Women, whether we acknowledge it or not, are the apostles who speak about God to their child. They are the ones who facilitate the relationship between God and the new born child. This continues for several years. Most probably during the teen’s years, existential questions may be asked by the young teenager which leaves some parents with their mouths wide open, in awkward silence.

Women are already acting like priests in their own families because they bring God to their family. What’s missing? It’s their input in the parish. We all know that more priests and bishops are becoming aware of the lack of priests in parishes (in Europe and North America). The first response is being that of amalgamating parishes. This is contrary to what people expect, because today we look for a sense of belonging in our parish. Now if the parish becomes bigger, that sense of community disappears. If that disappears, most probably church attendance will go down too. If that happens, what happens to Christianity if we don’t meet every Sunday? How are people going to learn how to find God in their busy lives?

One German bishop, is proposing a different path (finally). Yes lay people (those who are not priests), can manage a parish! Can you understand the meaning and the implications of it? Yes women too can manage a parish. The Holy Spirit always moves in hidden areas. There are many people out there who think that the Catholic Church will never change (it’s against our faith!!). Yet surprises will never stop in our life. The main problem is always the same. We have our own agenda and we want God to obey our ‘orders’. God will move his church when he deems fit. Obviously some of us who wish to hurry, will feel disappointed. Yet, as Catholics we have to bow to God’s will as we daily pray through our Father.

Now what does this mean? We need to prepare many lay people in order to take over our parishes. Obviously, they need preparation. When it comes to managing people, I do believe that some people are already highly qualified to do such job. The same goes for accounts and other daily running schedules. Yet the most important one (ie implying for married priests), they need to be trained in theological studies. This week I posted a link to a preacher who emphasized the role of women deacons in the early church. Now how many women know about that? Very few. If more lay people go to such courses, we could manage the church much better. Trained people is the best answer for tomorrow’s church because as we have seen in Germany, lay people one day will take over (with or without the consent of some priests!). Statistically this is beyond any doubt as future numbers will force the church to change path. The important thing is that we’ll have a good number of lay people who are prepared to take over as otherwise, unprepared and unqualified people will do more harm than good.

Let’s start thinking about the future, today or right now! May God Bless you all!

When people talk about married priests, it seems as if we are talking about the future such as when aliens will land on earth! Those hearing us discussing about married priesthood might jump into the conclusion that it’s still not being practiced in the Catholic Church. This assumption that we’re talking about future decisions might harm our reputation. Some might nickname us as rebels or people outside the church!

Well there are so many people out there that they don’t know that there are already married priests in the church! If one uses a search engine, one might encounter a lot of such cases. One particular story is found here. So please note that all those people who might start arguing that a married priest might not have enough time for his wife and children, it is already being done!

Obviously, the next question would be: why are Anglican priests allowed to become Catholic priests and bring their wives over whilst Catholic priests have to resign in order to get married?! In our opinion it is pure injustice.

We are of the opinion that people should start asking for married priests now in order that Pope Francis might say yes. He has already shown that he is moving slowly but surely in that direction. But he wants the people to ask for it in their diocese (the geographical place where a bishop and his priests/nuns etc..work together).

We, as a community, we have to understand that we cannot live in the catacombs afraid to mention such subject during our interaction with the rest of the parish! Somebody has to inform the rest of the parish. Somebody has to show the way. This is what it means to be an adult in faith. We cannot rely on others to do this kind of work. Most of the people who would call for married priests are unchurched (not going to church any more). It’s our duty to inform them of the latest changes in the Catholic church. Let’s take it as a challenge or if we wish to, as a lent exercise for this year!

Pope Francis is not a dictator. He wants to move with his flock. People now are experiencing the lack of priests in so many parishes (in the whole wide world except some countries in Africa). Now we either go for married priests or risk of loosing more parishes which would be without the Eucharist. The Eucharist is so central for the Catholic Faith.

    It is the time and place where the community meets (can we have a community if we never meet?).

    During the mass we hear the word of God (can we simply be brainwashed by the media not knowing what God really thinks?).

    We nourish our soul with the body and blood of Christ (can our body grow healthy without eating adequately? Now let’s focus about the food for our soul).

In other words the body and soul of the Catholic Church lies in the Eucharist. Shall we let more parishes die because of lack of priests or shall we move forward and allow more priests (married) to work in the vineyard of the Lord?

Our woman today is Dorothy. She was a former nun who became a policewoman (cop). She fell in love with a handsome and intelligent man (got his PhD), who happened to be a priest too. It seems that he presented himself as a priest who had left…but actually reading official documents, he didn’t leave at all. Like some other priests he wanted to have the best of both worlds: the married life and the celibate life!

This does not mean that all priests are like him. Some of the priests turn out to be wonderful fathers. Yet there is always a slight possibility that a priest is luring a woman for sex and just to have fun. It’s up to the mind of the woman to make sure that the priest is not playing at all. We are all in favour of married priests. Married means to stick to one woman and to take responsibility for one’s actions. We are NOT in favour of priests who just go around and use women for their own egoistic needs.

Where did you meet?

We met in Eldoret in 2005 at a convent where I was was being inculcated into sisterhood. Then based in Spain, Fr Oure had visited the convent on official assignment. The priest, however, showed interest on the first encounter.

What did he tell you when you met?

He lied to me about his exact role in church. Fr Oure would then make frequent visits to the nunnery, where he made sexual advances towards me.

When did you get married?

We married when I was 32 years old and he was 49, in December 2013, but we started experiencing problems barely three months into their marriage. He is a serial womaniser and his constant infidelity is the reason for our constant fights before we parted ways recently. I caught my husband in bed with another woman in our house in Nakuru’s Kasarani estate!

Do you have children?

Yes we have one son but I had miscarriage of our second child as this was caused by physical abuse by Fr Oure. He became so angry when I caught him on our matrimonial bed
with a prostitute!

What do you have in mind now?

I want to sue the church for damages as his order says that he is still ‘in’ the church.

Now for fairness sake, the priest is presenting a different version of facts but he didn’t deny sleeping with other women! So indirectly he had admitted to not being faithful. Like some other priests, he is not interested in marriage but in a concubine, where secretly he can have sex as much as he wants to! One can see the original article at: Article

The news is out…Brazil may soon have married priests. Who said so? It’s a famous theologian with the name of Leonardo Boff. He was once a member of the Franciscan order, as he left the order some years ago. He fits our description of priest really well.

How does he know about all this? Because he knows that the Brazilian bishops have explicitly asked for married priests. The pope wants to introduce married priesthood. Brazil maybe the country to experiment, sort of like a pilot experiment.

Boff boasts of having helped Pope Francis with his environmental encyclical, “Laudato Si’, on Care for Our Common Home.”! So it all shows that Boff is being welcomed once again to the official church.

An important comment was: will he work once again as a priest? Boff answered (as we have been constantly harping), there is no need, because he continued to help with the building of the basic communities, including the administration of the sacraments! In other words, once a priest, always a priest!

What does it mean for all of us? First of all, it shows that we were right from the very first step to insist on married priesthood. It wasn’t a sin or in theological words anathema! We were not outside the biblical basis. Our reasoning has a biblical basis which is a very strong point when dealing with arguments in theology.

Now the final practical part. When will it happen in your country? That is the question that we cannot give a definite answer. But instead of rushing, Pope Francis has shown the hand of a true father who does not wish to make his children run. He wants to give some time before it is introduced, so that many Catholics may come to terms with it. Now this is the most interesting part because most church goers have already accepted the idea of married priesthood! So it’s not too far away from making it happen in the whole church.

In the meantime, let’s not stand with our hands still and doing nothing. Let’s start talking, writing, communicating with other members in order to help Pope Francis in bringing over such change. If one does not feel comfortable in his community…there is the internet. It’s so huge and vast. One can go elsewhere to give the news and stimulate discussion. Although the best solution would be to speak with your own community. This means not imposing or shutting up people who do not agree but rather speaking calmly but surely about the beauty of married priesthood.

The Pope cannot do changes all alone. True leaders wait for the people in order to walk together. If we don’t make our move, it might be fatal. Let’s shout from our roofs’, balconies etc…..Let’s have priests like the biblical ones…..married and very close to Jesus!

The original article can be found here.

Women deacons = married priests?

When we were at school, we used a particular expression called the missing link (referring to apes in view of human beings). We are all the time pushing for a married priesthood. Yet maybe we are missing a good link. How can the Catholic Church allow its priests to get married when there is a low appreciation of women? The fact that some women marry a priest and are still regarded as those who tempted the priest to abandon the altar (table where mass is celebrated), may speak volumes! Why are all important decisions taken by men in the church?

The recent decision by the Pope to allow studies to investigate (it’s still a study, please don’t jump into conclusions), the case of women deacons, may finally help our cause. What’s a deacon? Well the deacon is one who celebrates all the sacraments (except mass and the sacrament of reconciliation), and could deliver a homily (explanation of the readings) during mass. But if you want a more detailed and a biblical explanation, go for this link. In any case, together with the married apostles, there is the hidden figures of their wives. What did they do? Surely as married couples, they were aware of Jesus’ call.

Let’s not forget about the Holy mother of God, Mary. She carried baby Jesus in her womb for nine whole months. Now by general criteria of priesthood, she would classify as a priestess: she gave Jesus to the world; She had great intimacy with her son; She suffered and practically took part in the sacrifice on the cross. In many saintly books, she is portrayed as the one who leads to Jesus (priests’ work). How can such a glaring example go unnoticed?

Mary Magdalene was the first person who saw the risen Christ, before the apostles according to the gospel. Does not this give a special message to women’s active participation in the church?

In today’s world, it’s still the woman in many cases who nurtures and keeps a close contact with children. She is the one to pass or not to pass on faith. She is the one who attends most frequently church activities (in some areas, statistics prove this). Lay women and lay men are the ones who share the priest’s vision for their parish. In most priestless parishes, they are the ones who are guarding our treasures. Whether we like it or not, this is going to be the future. Priests are much less and in the Western world they are going to be in such a small number, that they would be completely outnumbered by lay people. Shall we live in denial and still press for celibate priests?

On another level, one main argument which is being unfortunately discarded is that of the signs of the times. God is not enclosed in a book. God can speak to anybody in any time. If all the corporations, companies, schools and the general public, there is rising awareness of the importance of females, how can the church put its head in the sand by ignoring women? How can God speak to the general public in one way and then speak differently to the church?

In David Rice’s book, (Shattered Vows, Exodus from the priesthood), there is ample proof that the priests’ wives have increased the spirituality and enthusiasm of the priest to work for others whether in a sacramental form or another. Instead of writing negative comments about the church, maybe we need to be more positive and write about the miracles which take place in today’s church, through the active participation of women. Let’s hear from our readers, how they sanctify priests!

Falling in love is not just for the young ones. Even falling in love with a priest is not always a story between a young priest and a young woman, as this story illustrates. This is Jacqueline who is sharing her story with all our readers. She is first telling her story. In the second part, I’ll ask her some questions.

I think I just have to share this story. I am still shocked by it. It goes like this: I met this new priest about four years ago. We clicked instantly. He is now 48 years and I am now fifty. I was never married because I never wanted to, however I was so attracted to this foreign priest who came to our isles. Yes we kissed but there was never any sexual relations because I believed I should not be the one to do that with a priest [old school thinking]. After four years into the friendship he was transferred to another parish. He still visited my home once a week. Eighteen months in this parish he called me to tell me that he was leaving the country because of a situation [a sexual relation with a seventeen years and nine months girl and to please forgive him]. He said he had ignored her several times but eventually one day it happened.

One month afterwards, the girl started calling him and telling him dirty things when he was seen speaking with other women. When he told her about it, the girl told her parents. The result was that the priest had to flee the country like a scared puppy, never to return. All the parents wanted was that he would leave the country. We were in contact every step of his journey and I knew his agony.

Parishioners never knew the true reason why he was leaving. However, from his religions order (eg Franciscans, Jesuits, Carmelites etc…), where I knew some priests, I was able to find out that the young girl took a ready made meal at times to the priest. On that fateful day, realising that the priest was intoxicated, she began stripping and a sexual relationship took place. One priest told me that she was a problem girl and that it was evident in her messages e.g are you f***ing her?

I told him that I loved him as he left. A few days later we spoke and he said that it was a real test for him. The girl sent him a message saying that she hated him because her parents now hated her. That was two days after he left. He never replied and he never heard from her again. As for me I was in shock for days and I realised that if he cannot be faithful to God he cannot be faithful to no one. He is many many miles away from me but we do still communicate.

Where did you meet?
I met him in my parish.

What is his character?
I found he was the humblest man I ever met.

What was happening in his spiritual life?
He was extremely lonely for all his relatives were abroad. He was quite spiritual but very realistic.

What do you really think about his relationship with an under age girl?
I found he drank a bit too much but he never drank alone. After drinking he may have said foolish things. He was from a country where girls marry at sixteen years of age. Like in his country, he thought that a minor was sixteen years and under. I understand the temptation of priests. A priest in his order confided the entire scenario of what happened that dreadful day and the fact that the girl stripped in his presence to me, she was out for him and it was premeditated.

Why do you keep communicating? Is there a future for your relationship?
The incident is still fresh in my mind, I still want to know that he is good. He asked my forgiveness so I bear no grudges and he is miles and miles away from me, so very soon the communication will dwindle and he will be a memory. Definitely there is no future for us but I wish for him to get counselling and stop the drinking and be a good priest again.

Now to our readers to start the discussion. Just to start the ball rolling, does a sexual relationship happen all of a sudden? Is a priest prepared for such situations?

My name is Mary. My priest is Joe. I’m answering questions written by Rev Daniel.

Where did you meet?

l met him at my parish when he came to teach us music. We were preparing to record our album as a youth group, actually he was our producer.

What made him so attractive?

His voice attracted me because when he’s singing he’s so sweet!

How is he as a man?

He’s very good. I can’t even compare him with my boyfriend..he’s too good.

Who was the first to show any signs of affection?

He was the first to show signs of affection. He asked for my number indirectly, not knowingly. Looking back it seems that he had an agenda. In fact he started calling me many times and taking more than an hour for each call. He was telling me sweet things and how beautiful l was.

How did your relationship develop from that point onwards?

The relationship developed to an extent that l couldn’t go a day without talking to him, l felt loved when l was with him.

How many times did you meet?

We used to meet four times per week. l usually went to his place during the day or even spend the whole night with him, but now l have relocated, but l visit him whenever l have the chance.

Are you intimate with your priest?

Oh yes we are!

What makes you mad about this priest?

He’s so romantic and sweet. He’s just too good.

Does he run away or make himself unavailable sometimes?

Yes.

Does your relationship have a future?

I don’t think it has a future because at one point l got pregnant and he asked me to abort. He said that his job doesn’t allow him to have kids!

How does he judge your relationship?

He’s so jealous, he doesn’t want me to have any kind of relationship with any another man.

Aren’t you afraid that one day, somebody will discover your relationship?

Some people know and some they suspect that there is something going on between the two of us. But the most painful thing is that I’m not the only woman for him because I have seen used condoms in his house. Unfortunately l find myself going back to him. He was the first man l slept with…in other words he took my virginity…l do love him but I wish he could marry me.

Dear readers, it’s up to you now to make our blog very lively by your comments, questions and writings!

How can a woman help a priest?

After a series of writing which point out the difficulties of a relationship between a priest and a woman, now it’s the turn to focus on the positive effects on the life of a priest and his work in the parish.

Having a relationship. Priests are used to being transferred/and/or facing a large crowd. A priest can hide his true feelings or else can put on a mask and play a particular role. He is an actor after all. In most cases they can easily hide their true feelings. Their protective cover is that they preach during a mass (liturgy) where most people are silent listeners (contrary to today’s radio/television/internet programs where people react immediately to what they listen!!). In counselling he is still obliged to follow the role of a priest where he has to solve problems or at least to give intelligent answers.

In a one to one relationships, the priest can be on his own with no obligation to follow the rules nor play the intelligent or holy one. He can speak about his personal life. A woman can be a very good listener. Besides, she can point various hidden aspects in the life of the priest.

Receiving compliments. A relationship is not only giving but receiving too. Most priests are NOT good at receiving compliments because they are not used to it, besides other factors. One has to remember that like all public figures, the priest can be critically wounded by criticism. A woman can be the missing catalyst in the priest’s life. She enriches the priest life by giving the necessary positive criticism plus affection. A hug from such a significant person can work wonders. Consequently the fact that there is at least one person who cares in the congregation, makes the priest work harder.

Understanding people. We always believed that four eyes are better than two. The priest meets many people and has to deal with many situations. The fact that he is single handed, it means a big disadvantage. Directing a whole parish means hundreds of people (if not thousands!). The woman helps him to understand better some of the situations that he encounters. She can make him aware of many things going on in the situations surrounding his life.

Becoming more sensitive. Not all priests are sensitive to people (!!) especially to children. Women traditionally have been nearer to children. They nurture a natural sensitivity towards children. The priest is trained differently. Hence the presence of a woman helps him understand children, teenagers and young adults. In many cases, woman have experienced the challenge of taking care of a family, in some cases all alone. So they are well prepared for hard jobs. They know the difficulty of pulling ahead with little or no money at all. They know how to unite the family when there is no common point!

Physical appearance. A woman takes care about the look of her priest too. Most priests (although not all), are not concerned with their look. She can open up his wardrobe and add the necessary clothes in order to make the priest look more respected and approachable. Most priests are not that keen on wearing ‘good’ clothes.

A woman can take a close look at what the priest is eating, exercising, resting etc…..she looks at the big picture and feel if the priest is healthy, happy or undergoing the latest identity crisis!

Black and white plus grey. Some priests view people from a very rigid point of view: that of obeying or not obeying the Lord’s rules. Hence they would see very few bridges to connect with people. A woman can help rejuvenate the priest’s view by adding a totally different criteria. Most women will stand by their own children even when caught red-handed. Most priests would need a new and radical way to approach others. A woman can be so instrumental in this sense.

Learning to face adversity. They experience as well the daily challenges of living under the same roof although having totally different opinions. They know how to sow seeds of quick and diplomatic words which might stop a fight from becoming a full fledged war! She can provide a well thought feedback together with the necessary training for facing similar situations in the larger family (ie parish).

Living true Love. The greatest asset is her focused love on the priest. Love is God. No theological book can explain the beauty of the God unless one falls in love. It is the most practical guide to get to know and experience God Himself! In this sense, a woman who falls in love with a priest is God’s greatest blessing as it brings the priest a new horizon and spirituality in his life.

Our wish, for those who are already in a relationship with a priest, is to love your priest in the way you know best in the present circumstances. Make him experience a new birth of Christ! This might include as well loving him from a distance or not having him at all. But once he feels your radiation of love, even from kilometres away, it changes his life completely to one where he can feel God thoroughly. A happy Christmas to all our readers with these kind of thoughts in our mind.

Please we did not write all the reasons how a woman can enrich a priest’s life. It’s up to our beloved readers to continue writing about this theme for the Christmas season!

The answer is obviously no. Than why do you fall in love to a man who is unavailable? It seems very similar to falling from high above without using a parachute!!

What’s so surprising is that the priest makes it feel as if it’s ok to preach to the others while having an affair with a woman. The reasons given by some priests in order to justify their sexual intimacy have been astounding! Some have said that God is loving the woman! Others have said that they have been given such a gift by God himself! One priest said that he needs to explore God’s temple (= woman’s body). Another priest said to a prostitute: on a Sunday I’m the priest (=in church) but today I’m Mr……!!!

On the other hand, surprisingly, the woman too has been brainwashed because she seems to be convinced that it is a real relationship, which can blossom into a real family. This is not just a piece of information, but most of the woman belief it with all their heart, body and soul!

Is it because they think that nowadays the priest is going to leave priesthood and marry them to have a wonderful family? We have always insisted that we don’t support clandestine relationships. We are trying to explain to people that celibacy should be optional but in the meantime the priest has to decide: shall he continue with the relationship and leave the parish or forget about the woman and continue walking in the same direction? It’s not right to play with the emotional life of a woman or of any other significant other. One has to decide which way to go. We feel obliged in conscience to alert all women that a hidden relationship with a priest is a recipe for disaster. Please apply your mental brakes at the very beginning of the relationship!

The first part of the article seems to be written by somebody who wants the priest to stay at all costs in the parish. Well it’s not. After experiencing so much suffering from women who have been abused by priests, the call for justice takes an upper hand. We cannot hear so many stories and remain indifferent. It’s not because we want to keep the status-quo of forced celibacy. On the contrary we are trying to make our voice heard by the present Pope Francis to make celibacy optional.

On the other hand, listening to some women, we are reminded what somebody once said: that the heart has reasons, which the mind can never comprehend!! We have been insisting many times that relationships are not simply like an operation where one operates a series of buttons. It’s not an on and off action. We truly believe that some women can’t help it but fall in love. As we have repeatedly said, the priest speaks about a lot of virtues, values and principles plus being available to hear their stories, which consequently makes him so attractive, plus that, it fills them with awe and desire to stay alongside such a wonderful person.

Obviously, as a married priest, we cannot forget that in some occasions, the woman-priest relationship has blossomed into a real relationship and consequently into a happy family. The married priest has been confirmed as more happy and that he works more confidently in his pastoral care. He is in a better position to understand today’s challenges. We are all in favour of married priesthood, yet not all priests wish to let go of the riches, advantages and perks which come with a solitary life!

This is the message which we are willing to share with most of our readers. Beware that your handsome priest, might be a different person when challenged to live a family life! Maybe he wants to have the cake and eat it too! Please do write and give your honest opinion!