Tag Archive: priests who have sex with a woman


Churchgoers and the unchurched!

Young people struggle to find their place on earth. They have to get to know themselves really well in order to find what are they going to do with their own lives. Consequently they’ll find the right job and then hopefully, the right partner!

I see something similar in the church. We all know that life has changed drastically. We see things differently for various reasons. What about the church? Well many people have left. Others have stayed. Yet, on what level do they participate? Most of them simply follow the same timetable and principles for ages. Others are contrary to any change. Surveys have shown that most people who are still attending church, are in their majority ‘conservative’ people. It means that they oppose great changes for whatever reason! Some of these people would like to remove Pope Francis just because they think he is taking away the old teaching of the church. Well, they are truly ignorant of the gospel because most of the apostles were married!! See https://www.thedailybeast.com/vatican-may-approve-married-priests-but-conservative-catholics-arent-celebrating

So can one expect great changes? I don’t think so because the most people who are the right agents for change have long left. So who can make changes after all? Sincerely we don’t have an answer!

This is in part the society of today: we wish to make changes yet no one would like to be in the midst of the struggle! When we were young they used to tell us the story of the mice and the big, ferocious cat. The mice had their meeting in order to put a bell around the neck of the cat. After hours of discussion, one old mouse, in a soft voice just asked: Who is going to put the bell around the cat’s neck? Silence fell. It’s useless that we would like changes to take place if we abandon the church!

I know from experience that going for church’s meetings it’s not the most interesting job of the world. Sometimes one has to meet lots of old people (with all due respect to the old ones whom we cherish a lot). Most of them seem to be stuck in the 1900s! We see the usual faces. Very rare to see new ones! Besides, the young ones are not easy to make them attend besides the 1001 appointments that they have to attend to!

To add insult to injury, in the world, in a generic sense, there is a lot of prejudice or ignorance of what the true religion says! So many valid persons who have lots of talents, won’t come to church owing to prejudice, ignorance or outright hate of all that pertains to the religious world! This is one of the most challenging visions of the church. How can we bring back the lost majority? What kind of teaching do we present? What are people looking for?

Again we present the married priest as a one who is living in the world today! He has the right mixture to be an ambassador to many young, adults or non-believers. The fact that they see him struggling with everyday normal timetables, would be a great asset. As Pope Paul the sixth once wrote: the world doesn’t need preachers but rather people who testify with their own lives!

Easter Sunday

The gospels are interesting to read from several points of view. One of them is for contrasts. The people next to Jesus who have witnessed the most astonishing miracles, walked side by side with Him for some years. They are so proud of their master. On Good Friday they are nowhere to be seen. They are terrified of anyone associating them with Jesus. Peter made a solemn oath of not knowing Jesus!

The leader is gone. All the followers run for their lives. They are nowhere to be seen. But they have witnessed the most extraordinary events in their lives??!! This is because fear took over. One of the biggest threats to faith is fear. Fear of what the others might say. Fear of being judged. Fear of being different. Fear of showing your true faith to others. Fear of loosing friends. Fear of being fired. Fear of the future. Fear of others. Fear of the immigrants. Fear of…….The list goes on and on.

Are we afraid? Afraid of what? The fact that I don’t have more stories (for the time being), means that people are afraid of sharing their intimate story with a priest, even though we promised not to reveal real names nor geographical position!

If we wish to see change in the church and yet we are not ready to jump, then maybe we are procrastinating change in the Catholic Church. Maybe like the apostles we are still experiencing Good Friday but not Easter Sunday!

Jesus has won death itself – our greatest enemy. What are we afraid of, exactly? Why is this fear keeping us from transmitting our message? When discussing with others, it’s the others who might be afraid of change, not us!

We have to start the ball rolling as we don’t expect others, especially the priests to speak in our name! On the other hand, it might be interpretated as Pharisaic because whilst we demand the priest to leave everything for the name of love, we are so afraid to touch the hot potato subject of married priests. Myself, I have lost the ‘comfortable’ job of working at the university. Other priests had to emigrate. Others receive a very low pay. Others are still shunned by most of the people, family members included! A few of them have committed suicide. I wish I could reveal the many emails/communication that I receive. Unfortunately, everybody seems to be a victim of fear as they don’t give me permission to publish!

One of the tactics used by most bishops, is that these are very few cases! This is not true. But how can I explain that I have so many cases on my hands if I cannot disclose any information about many stories?

I truly believe that everybody can do something small but with great love and determination. One can send messages through many parts of the world in different ways. I can’t give a general formula for everybody! It’s up to each person to study it’s own personal life and act accordingly.

May the Risen Christ give you enough courage to be bold enough and strengthen the church by suggesting married priesthood.

One makes unique decisions all the time: house; wife or husband; number of children; job; holiday etc….We are accustomed to think about decisions. We evaluate the situation to the best of our knowledge. We do sometimes ask for an opinion. We look back for any kind of experience which might help us. We look to the future. Finally we take a decision. As adults we know that there could be no photocopier to copy our decision from past ones or what other people might have decided. Each new significant moment will involve a new and unique decision. It is the moment where one feels all alone…..

What about the church? It’s been for many many centuries where other people will tell you what to do! Some of the hard fanatics of the old religion usually refer to rules. In actual fact they wish to have a life where everything you’ll do will be written in black and white so there is no need to think, but just to follow the rules. Is this what God really wants?

We celebrated the Second Vatican Council (teaching of the church) around 50 years ago (meeting for all Catholic bishops). Now one of the giant steps forward was the declaration of the conscience as the private and unique space where God and the individual meet….and one takes decisions (Dignitatis Humanae no. 7). No one has the right to force one to go against one’s beliefs!!!  Unfortunately, many baptized people do not know anything about these documents!!!

Reading some of the cases where a priest falls in love, or somebody falls in love with a priest surely is not the right place for people who have always followed somebody’s opinion or advice. They will never rise to the occasion as the sense of guilt will ruin everything. This type of relationship is for those who are really open to a new life or adventure in the Spirit. In life there are people who are busy doing their work with no time left to think about others……..there are other people who learn and accept new people and new situations as ‘God given’. They do not look on the inside or in a book but look outside to learn. The latter most likely never expect the perfect situation but see God’s writing on the wall. They are the kind of people who are close in touch with God as they never nag about the weather or the neighbour or the colleague. They seem to work in all seasons!!

These are the kind of people who see a new emerging church in today’s world. They see the fact of falling in love with a priest as a great blessing. One can see the life of a priest before and after falling in love. How many priests are just doing their work as part of a routine? How do they work afterwards? I’ve  seen countless of them. They are transformed. Surely priests do need the love of a woman to revolutionize all their work. Love does bring about great changes in people especially the priest.

Women shouldn’t feel at guilt but rather proud, as those who are bringing real and effective changes in the church. It’s the not the charismatic popes who bring about real changes as we have already seen in history, but rather communities who have thought, prayed and took bold decisions before the priests did. These people have one thing in common: they never waited for others to tell them what to do. They defined history by taking a new road. Are our Christians prepared to be adults in faith or do they wish to be taken by the hand and just be lead?

There are many communities around the world who are asking for married priests in the Catholic Church. Can we simply shut them off or label them as ‘wrong’?  We firmly believe that God uses the bible and other means to make us hear our message. It’s up to us to open our ears and listen attentively to His message. The Catholic married priest can bring about a new meaning for priesthood and the church. The church would become relevant to many people who have already voted with their feet by finding Christ elsewhere. It’s time for the laity (not priests or nuns) to start the revolution by showing the right way to the future. Those who still wait for the present hierarchy (bishops) to make the first step will surely be disappointed. It has been proved by history many many times.